Clean Your Room, Stack Your Chips
2008-01-18 16:34:20
By:
Gene Bromberg
When Annie Duke was asked to testify during the Judiciary Committee's hearing on Internet Gambling her mere presence destroyed many of the stereotypes online gaming's opponents have used in the past (and present). Annie's an educated, clear-thinking and clear-speaking advocate for poker, and she's also a woman and a mom. One of the most powerful moments during her testimony came when she said that the government shouldn't be responsible for keeping kids away from online gaming--that should be the responsibility of
their parents. And she used her own kids as an example of how it's not difficult for attentive, involved parents to keep their children from gambling illegally.
How parents choose to raise their kids is their business (and their responsibility), but there aren't too many Moms and Dads out there who don't look for some helpful advice from time to time. Whether it be from their own parents or friends or books...or maybe even their weekly poker game.
Because, according to Annie, there are
parenting tips to be gleaned from poker. Maybe not of the eat-your-broccoli-its-good-for-you type, but as poker is a game of psychological manipulation some of the skills you might use at the table might be successful on your little ones. In the article Annie says, "That is what you learn about poker, that it is all about control of your opponent and getting them to act they way you want them to."
And that often means showing more patience and far-reaching thinking that your kids are capable of (or give you credit for). From the article:
Duke rarely goes all in - when a player bets everything on a single hand - with her kids. She says too many parents go all in by resorting to the ultimate punishment too quickly. "'If you don't stop biting your sister we are not going to Disneyland' is essentially going all in: You will either lose big or win big on the threat, and that means it is not usually a good move," Duke says.
The better play is to figure out the minimum needed to get the behavior you want, Duke believes. In her case, the minimum is often a time out.
"What poker does is start connecting the quality of your decisions with the quality of their outcome."
Of course, sometimes making an insane, over-the-top threat feels good when you're frustrated and feel like your more subtle attempts to control the situation have been ignored. Just as sometimes shoving in all your chips with nine-high against an aggressive opponent feels good because, at last, you've taken a stand. But when your bluff is called--either by an six-year-old screaming in a crowded store that SHE HATES YOU!! or by some hoodie-wearing punk who instacalls and turns over pocket Kings, you'll quickly see that your masterful all-in play was not the optimal play.
There are some informative little tidbits from Annie at the Q&A at end of the piece, none more amusing than the first one:
Honestly, what can you learn about parenting sitting across from a bunch of sleep deprived, loudly dressed men in ugly hats?
One thing you learn is that you don't want your children to turn out like them.
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